My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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