i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
