Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
