My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize