I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Randomize
