Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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