In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
