dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
