Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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