So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
