Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
