I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
