on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
