wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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