So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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