can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Say something about gay babies.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
