I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
