It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
