due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
That accounts for only three of the penises
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
