I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
