god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
