problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
