So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
