yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
