Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
