I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
