My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
