Heybabeimwearingurpanties
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
