Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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