at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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