Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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