Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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