I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
