Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
