He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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