Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
as a side note pls kill me
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
