i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Randomize
