I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
4 words: hood of his car
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I want to be your penis for a week.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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