He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
