Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
