she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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