I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
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