if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize
