Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
