I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Don't EVER smell your tampon
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
