okay pat passed out under dana's car
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
