Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
