didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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