what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
