So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
